Egg-citing evening

All this talk about eggs, and now an evening filled with them. Or should I say, not filled with them. You see, eating any foods from out on the local economy (eggs included) is prohibited by the big, bad, mean all encompassing rule called General Order #1. The order on what you can and can not do includes rules on alcohol, who you can and can not have sex with (guys from Australia are allowed, but don’t hook up with a guy from Nepal), prohibiting photographing of dead Soldiers and body parts, etc. All the super big no-no’s are included. Since breaking General Order #1 could have some serious repercussions, even if it is something as little as eating an Iraqi chicken egg, I am not admitting to ANYTHING on this blog. So, in the spirit of all things Internet and fun, I will now share with you what I did not do this evening.

I did not look in the fridge at work to see a dozen beautiful, glowing fresh brown eggs looking back at me. I did not know of their origin from a local store. I did not do something naughty and selfish, such as sneaking one of the little treasures into the pocket of my uniform, ever so carefully as to not break the shell. I in no way brought the egg to my room, and pondered how I could cook the yummy yellow and white goodness inside.

I did not set up my hotpot, complete with copious amounts of bottled water, and gently lowered the egg inside with a spoon. I did not participate in the careful and tedious monitoring of the boiling water as the little brown oval of happiness bounced around inside. I completely deny cooking the egg for 10 minutes (just to be sure) and then letting it sit for half an hour in the hot water to complete the process. I also further deny that the cooked egg now rests in my apartment fridge, in a mug, ready to be cracked and eaten tomorrow evening with a touch of salt and pepper.

The best part of this whole deal, which never happened of course, is the actual cooking process. Let me explain about this Iraqi hot water pot contraption. It’s as simple as you can get- add water, plug in, water boils, unplug pot. Not even an on-off switch. The battle comes when trying to ‘not’ boil an egg. How do you maintain constant temperature for 10 minutes- when the only way to turn it off is to unplug it? Leaving it plugged in results in violently boiling water that could cause some serious flash-burns. So what I didn’t do was to sit next to my trusty hot pot and plug-in and unplug the cord every 10 seconds or so for the entire 10 minutes. It really is a wonder that I didn’t get electrocuted from my egg that I didn’t cook. Ha!

I decided to wait til tomorrow night to eat the egg that I don’t have, so I could enjoy it more. That sounds incredibly stupid, right? But by the time I was ‘not’ finished cooking the egg, it was time for my evening phone call with my boyfriend, and then my room mate was asleep. When you put this much time, effort, energy, and thought into ‘not’ cooking an egg, you really want to sit down and enjoy the sucker. At least 10 minutes of enjoyment- this may be the only egg I ‘don’t’ eat for another year.

Below: A photo of an egg. Completely random photo from the internet, of course.